There are no mistakes...

As the years go by, and my faith in Christ grows stronger, I've come to realize something...there are no mistakes.  It was not a mistake that I found that article a few weeks before Camden was born. It was not a mistake that I saw Camden's Down Syndrome before anyone else. And, it was NOT a mistake that God gave us this sweet angel of a baby with Down Syndrome. I truly believe that. There are times, when I look at him and think, if I could give him a pill that would "cure" his Down Syndrome, I wouldn't do it. I wouldn't change him. It's hard to imagine that unless you have a child with special needs. I'm sure there are so many people (myself included) that hope/had hoped they do not have to walk this same journey. But, for better or for worse, this is the one God has chosen for me. Although I have faith in Him and I've put this in His hands, I do wonder...will he ever be able to do certain things, like Algebra or play football? Will he get married? Will he live with us the rest of his life? There are so many unknowns with any child, but these are the things I wonder about with Camden.  I know there are things that he will do that we don't know yet, but I can't help but think that there are some things that he will never do...like have children. So many things that you don't think about when your baby is only 7 and 1/2 months old, but I feel like these things have already been written in his story.  But, so many things are yet to be written! I cry right now as I think about this piece of my heart that I never knew was missing...until he was born. And as I watch Camden and Carter interact more and play together, my heart is so happy because I have been given such an amazing gift. I get to have these little people in my life and watch them learn and grow and smile and laugh.  I image that this must be how God feels when he watches over us, His children. I am so grateful for God's presence in our lives. He has made us a stronger family and I pray that He continues to strengthen us as our children get older and our trials become more difficult. 
Sometimes I wish I could just stop time for a little while and keep things as they are. I want my babies to stay little as long as possible. Every day they're a little bigger, a little smarter and I realize I will never get this time back again.  So, for now I will enjoy my boys and try to take in every little moment (except maybe the tantrums ;)) I will try not to worry about tomorrow, but live for today because tomorrow, they'll be a little more grown up :)